A Birthday and a Death: Two Major Influences

Well, here I am again, less than 24 hours after what was largely an obligatory posting and one year to the day since I started this blog. And today, I want to make note of two men who had a major influence on my life.

In a sense, this rather coincidental pairing seems odd. These two men were most likely very, very different. In fact, one of them I have never met while the other I have communicated with regularly for the past 25 years. The first of these is Jerome David Salinger, commonly known as J. D. Salinger, who turns 90 today. The second is Norman J. Konzen, who frequently went by N. J. Konzen, who died on Christmas Day, a little more than a month after his 91st birthday.

I first read J. D. Salinger's "The Catcher in the Rye" when I was a 16-year old Junior in High School. To say it played a major role in my life would be a huge understatement. After reading "Catcher" I next read everything else that Salinger had written: Nine Stories, Franny & Zooey and Raise High the Roofbeam Carpenters. I even had an opportunity to use the line in a wedding toast for a friend of mine: "Raise high the roofbeam, carpenters. Like Aries comes the bridegroom, taller far than a tall man." When I ran out of current material I scoured the library seeking out old short stories that he had published in The New Yorker. Next I turned to other authors that Salinger had mentioned in his works. I read Franz Kafka and ultimately F. Scott Fitzgerald. Reading Fitzgerald sent me down an even longer road of discovery, and an English Major was created.

I ended up reading "Catcher" several more times. How many? I don't know, maybe a dozen. The last time I read it was for a class on "coming of age" that I had taken as part of my course work for my second Masters. In that last reading, I think I had a new insight as to what was really bothering Holden Caufield. He was emotionally constipated. He took everything in and let nothing out. He was literally holdin' everything. In that sense, I think he was a lot like me, or I like him. And so, today, J. D. Salinger turns 90. Happy birthday, if you're really still around, hiding out somewhere in New England.

Norm Konzen was my first boss and my mentor in the world of banking. Norm was quite a character, fastidious to a degree that most could never imagine. He took nerve pills, drank 1 and 1/2 Manhattens every evening -- "one is not enough and two are too many" -- had a beloved parakeet named Petey and loved to play golf. He had more golf balls than he could ever use. Every Christmas, every birthday, people bought Norm golf balls. But, as he used to say, "I don't hit them far enough to lose them or hard enough to bruise them." And he was right -- Norm played golf every weekend and he never broke 90. But, he turned me on to the game, and it has been a major part of my life for the past quarter century. Unlike Norm, I broke 90 -- one time!

Interestingly, Norm also taught me a lot about -- sex! Well, at least he taught me all I really needed to know. "I'm not very good, but I'm enthusiastic," Norm always said. I try to live by that motto.

Despite being about as old-fashioned as a guy could be, Norm could see the future. I came back from vacation one day in 1981 and there was a memo that went out announcing that the bank was forming a micro-computer task force. I knew nothing about computers, had no interest in them and so I threw the memo away. Norm retrieved it from the trash and said, "I think you better apply for this." So, I BS'd my way through the application and was one of 14 employees selected to get an Apple Computer and some training on how to use it. It was that selection that has kept me employed for the past 28 years.

I only worked with Norm for a little under two years when he retired and moved to Florida with his wife. I would send him a letter each year on his birthday -- November 20th -- and he would write to me every Christmas. The past several years Norm's health has been slipping badly. He was nearly blind. Thanks to the magic of computers, I kept increasing the font size of my letters so that he could still read them. I visited him once in Florida and he came up to South Bend for a visit 6 or 8 years ago. That was the last time I saw him. He called me once at work when I was out and he left a voice message for me. In that message he thanked me for my letters and he told me that he loved me. No non-relative male had ever said that to me, before or since, and I doubt that any ever will.

This year's Christmas letter, written by his wife because Norm was too ill, was sadly prophetic. She wrote, "This holiday season will be a very sad one for the Konzens." Little did she know that he would die on Christmas Day.

So, two men, both in their 90s, both with a major impact on the chain of events that has been my life.

Happy Birthday, and Rest in Peace.